


Thicker Than Water

by heartsdesire456



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, Developing Friendships, Happy Ending, Love Confessions, M/M, Old Friends, Post-Season 2, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-30
Updated: 2016-05-30
Packaged: 2018-07-11 03:34:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7026880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartsdesire456/pseuds/heartsdesire456
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When one of his oldest friends asks him to protect Simon during his banishment, Magnus's new relationships and old friendships put him in an awkward situation. With the threat of Camille, the fallout of Simon's betrayal, and the looming threat of war with Valentine hanging over their heads, everybody has to make difficult choices. All anybody can do is hope each decision is the right one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thicker Than Water

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is far too long for how much plot it has but whatever! I finished it so I'm posting it. Mostly I just wanted to write a fic in which Raphael and Magnus's relationship as old friends is examined more closely.

“What did you do?!” Magnus startled and turned around just as Raphael forced himself through Magnus’s open balcony doors with rage in his eyes.

Magnus frowned. “Raphael-“ He gasped and ducked when Raphael _took a swing_ at his head. “Whoa!”

Raphael caught him by the shirt and slammed him into the brick wall behind him, making his breath rush out of him. “You,” he snarled, eyes wide and fangs bared. “You sent the _Shadowhunters_ into my hotel to bust out Camille!”

Magnus raised a finger, looking down at Raphael uneasily. “For the record, I didn’t know they were going to break her out, I just found out she had the book and told them. They said they set up a meeting with you-“

“And I wouldn’t let them talk to her,” Raphael said, shoving Magnus away, glaring when he didn’t fall down like he wanted him to, but rather spun around gracefully and straightened his clothes. “Why didn’t you just come to me? Why would you send a bunch of children to destroy everything I’ve worked for-“

“Raphael,” he countered. “I had an injured Shadowhunter to heal, I was taking care of a woman that did a lot for me, so I had to trust them-“

“To break Camille out?” Raphael countered, and Magnus shook his head, scoffing.

“Of course not. You know I didn’t want that,” Magnus defended, turning to look him in the eyes. “Do you think for a second I wanted her out-“

Raphael stalked closer. “I don’t care what you wanted!” Raphael’s voice raised as he continued on. “I gave them her stuff, I was willing to work with them, but those impulsive Shadowhunters not only let her out but they used my fledgling to do it!” He held up a bandaged hand. “I could’ve _died_ because of that _Shadowhunter bitch_ breaking a wall and letting the sunlight in. We could’ve all died! _Simon_ could’ve burned right there in front of me,” he said, and then he took a sharp breath. “And now I had to order both of them be killed on sight.” He swallowed hard, glaring at Magnus. “Camille is dead, she just does not know it yet.”

“Good,” Magnus said simply. He was beyond caring if she lived or died. He loved her once, and he didn’t wish death on almost anybody, but she had reached a point at which her harm to the world was greater than his wish that nobody die. “She’s ruined enough lives for one vampire. It’s time for someone to stop her. The time has come where she’s finally going to pay for what she’s done.”

Raphael’s voice cracked when he spoke again. “And so is my fledgling.” His voice was strangely weak and Magnus found himself pausing to really look him in the eyes. Raphael seemed to take it for confusion because he continued speaking, shoulders sagging. “He betrayed us. He freed her. I cannot let my clan seek revenge upon the Shadowhunters… but he is a vampire. He will be the one to take the fall for them, and there is nothing I can do without appearing too weak to lead my people.” 

Magnus watched curiously as Raphael turned around, rubbing his hands over his face as he walked away. He turned around with a roar and punched Magnus’s wall, breaking the bricks and the skin of his knuckles. Magnus waved a hand and fixed the wall and then walked over, holding out his hand. “Raphael, let me-“

“You’ve done enough,” Raphael said hoarsely. “The only reason I have not taken it out on you as well is because your precious Shadowhunters would have my head for it.” 

Magnus was shocked. Raphael had always been his friend. As long as he had known him, while they were not friend _ly_ , they had a deep bond that was the closest to family that Magnus had ever felt. Raphael would die for him, or so he thought. “I know I’m not a vampire, but you and I have been, and I thought always would be, friends. What could be so important about one fledgling that you would come after _me_ , Raphael?”

Raphael laughed hollowly, turning to raise his eyes to Magnus’s. Magnus was startled to see pain unlike any he had seen in decades in those eyes. “He is not just any fledgling. Not to me.”

Realization hit Magnus like a truck and he raised a hand to cover his mouth as it hung open in shock. “Oh-“

“Yes, ‘oh’!” Raphael snapped, voice ragged. “I ordered death upon the man I care for and it’s all because your precious little Shadowhunters cannot leave well enough alone!”

Magnus wasn’t sure what he could say or do. “Raphael-“

“Enough,” Raphael said softly. “You- You have no idea what you have done.”

“Camille has probably ruined my life again, so I have some idea,” Magnus countered. “I mean it’s not ‘kill the man I love’ bad, I grant you, but-“

“Tell them to protect Simon.” Magnus looked at him with a raised eyebrow and Raphael gave him a pained look. “I can’t call them off of him. I can’t. My people need me as their leader. I cannot be selfish. If I call them off, they will throw me out and they need me. But your Shadowhunters… they can protect him. Don’t let the Werewolves do it, or my clan will fight them for him, and the last thing I need is a war with the Werewolves.” He nodded weakly. “But the Shadowhunters are untouchable. They can protect him. It’s all I can do,” he admitted, voice sounding hollow and empty of all emotion. “Knowing Simon, he’ll disobey them and come out alone. But please… please try.”

Magnus nodded solemnly. He understood the position Raphael was in. Raphael devoted his life to making the vampires good people. He was the main reason they curbed their appetites for human blood, not the Accords. They would probably have all been willing to break the Accords were it not for Raphael convincing them it was _wrong_ not just illegal. Raphael was a good man, and a good vampire. Magnus would trust him with his life, and that was saying a lot. 

So he understood why Raphael was trusting him with his heart. 

“I’ll do what I can to protect him,” Magnus swore. “If anything happens, I’ll keep you updated.”

Raphael just nodded and then, just as quietly as he arrived, he left, going out onto the balcony and hopping over the edge.

~

Magnus has actually only asked for Clary to bring Simon to him, but he wasn’t that disappointed when Isabelle came so that he could ask her what the fuck she had been thinking with that trick with the sunlight Raphael talked about. He was less happy that Alec had come with them but things were awkward with them already, so yelling at his sister couldn’t make Alec more uneasy than he already was around Magnus.

“Simon,” he greeted, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Good news.” He nodded simply. “You’re living with me now. Cool? Cool.”

Simon blinked. “What?”

Clary stepped up, brows furrowed. “Wait, what are you talking about? Simon’s staying at the institute with us.”

Magnus turned to her with a smile that didn’t meet his eyes. “No, Biscuit, he’s not.” He shook his head. “After the stunt you Shadowhunters pulled at the Hotel DuMort, I’m going to look after him here.” He patted Simon’s arm. “You can pick up all your things tomorrow after the sun sets. I’ve got the spare room set up for you already-“

“Why do I have to come stay with you?” Simon asked with a frown. “I mean, I like you but I don’t really know you.”

Magnus grinned. “Well we’re gonna get to know each other a lot better now, Roomie!”

Alec uncrossed his arms. “What are you talking about some stunt at the Hotel DuMort?” he asked cautiously.

Simon slumped his shoulders. “I’m banished from the Clan. Raphael gave the order to kill me on sight-“

“What did you _do_?” Alec asked in surprise. 

Clary sighed, rolling her eyes. “Raphael wouldn’t let us talk to Camille so Simon snuck me in in a casket while Isabelle distracted Raphael and she wouldn’t tell us where the book was unless we took her with us, so we broke her out.”

Alec just stared at her. “You mean you _helped her escape_?” he asked slowly. “I thought they released her to you.”

Simon shook his head. “We had to save Jocelyn, so we had to let her go.” He sighed. “I wish we could’ve gone about it differently. Raphael was really mad. He’s definitely going to kill me-“

“How could you do something so stupid?” Alec asked, stalking closer, looking down at Simon. “You dragged _Shadowhunters_ into a rivalry with the Vampires? Clary and Izzy could have targets on their backs right now because you had some harebrained scheme-“

Magnus held out a hand between them. “First, back away from Simon,” he said, giving Alec a pointed look. “Second, that is exactly why Simon is coming to stay with me,” he pointed out. “Clary and Isabelle-“ He looked over at them, “While I love you both,” he added, turning back to Alec, “Used Simon’s friendship and the love he has for Jocelyn to convince him to betray his Clan. Granted, I’m sure that spiteful bitch being his sire helped him along since he can’t help the bond,” he added. “But, with his Clan putting a price on his head since they can’t touch the Shadowhunters, and the notorious rivalry between them and Luke’s Werewolves, Simon is staying with me until enough time has passed he can work on getting back in good with his Clan,” he finished, smiling in a way that tried so hard to convey that he didn’t want any argument.

Alec just looked at him in that way he had that made Magnus feel like he could see into Magnus’s very thoughts, but Clary was the one to stop Alec’s searching gaze by interrupting. “Look, we did what we had to do to save my mom. You were the one who told us where the book was-“

Magnus turned to face her. “And I expected you to get it from Raphael, Biscuit. The only reason I didn’t raise any questions sooner than now is because I was a little thrown off by The Bitch from Hell showing up and fucking with my head,” he said more harshly than he usually spoke. “I’m not too proud to admit that Camille scares the hell out of me because she knows how to twist my mind and use me and I’m actually on board with Raphael’s plan to hunt her down and kill her before she tries to get to you just to hurt me, Clarissa,” he admitted. “You may have sketchy memories, but it’s not news that I have a fondness for the sweet little girl I watched grow up her whole life. Camille has more resources in the Downworld than even I do.” He shook his head. “It’s no skin off my nose if Camille burns, but Simon is a different story. If the Vampires get him, it will bring you all down on them and I can’t have that.”

Isabelle scoffed. “Let them try-“

Magnus felt a wave of anger towards her and he raised a finger, turning to face her fully. “Alright, I don’t need to hear any Shadowhunter superiority from you, Isabelle.” He shook his head warningly. “I really like you, my dear, but the shit you pulled at the DuMort was such classic superiority complex bullshit.”

Isabelle looked taken aback. “Magnus, what-“

“You broke a wall and let in _daylight_ to try and stop the Vampires, you stupid, selfish child,” he said strongly. “I know you meant well, but you could’ve killed them! You could’ve killed _Simon_ ,” he stressed. “You may be better than your parents, but you exhibited such textbook disregard for those you deem ‘inferior’ to your super special angel blood-“

Alec stepped closer. “Magnus, leave her alone,” he said softly, but Magnus held a hand up in front of Alec, stopping him.

“No, I won’t leave her alone, because I know you three at least can _learn_ from this lesson,” he said, turning back to her, stepping closer. “You all go on about how Downworlders are people too, and yet you still can’t even see your own superiority complex. You risked the lives of every vampire in that room. Any of them could’ve been in the light when you broke that wall. Simon, your _friend_ , could’ve been in the light and he would’ve disintegrated before your eyes,” he stressed. “You came this close to killing Raphael!” He held his fingers about a centimeter apart in front of her face. 

She glared, shoulders squared defensively. “So? That vampire was trying to kill Simon for doing what he had to to help us-“

“So when does a Downworlder go from ‘that vampire’ to a person? What’s the difference in you Nephilim giving the cup to Valentine and a vampire freeing the most evil vampire of all?” He shook his head, spluttering with anger. “Simon is Simon, but all the rest are ‘that vampire’ to you, and you don’t see what’s wrong with that? What about me? I’m just a Warlock?”

Clary interrupted. “You’re our friend, Magnus.”

He turned to her with pained eyes. “You learned what you are and _days_ later you called me ‘Warlock’ right here in this room.” He saw her eyes widen in surprise and he shook his head. “You weren’t even raised in it and you already felt like you’re better than me because you’re a little angel girl and I’m just a Downworlder.” He turned back to Isabelle, who looked suitably cowed, eyes downcast. “You are better than this, Isabelle Lightwood,” he said softly. She looked up and he shook his head. “You are _better_. You just have to think about this stuff.” He turned and walked back over to Simon. “So you’re staying with me, not the Nephilim.”

Alec sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Magnus, nothing will happen to Simon with us.”

Magnus turned to him, head inclined. “I’m sorry, Alexander, but too much can go wrong. Even the strongest vampires can go without blood too long and then snap and attack someone. It’s a mistake and not their fault and they usually let go immediately so nobody is hurt, but if that happened at that Institute you know damn well what would happen to Simon.” He shook his head. “I’m not letting an innocent Downworlder die because of Shadowhunters thinking we don’t matter.”

“You help us all the time,” Isabelle tried and Magnus gritted his teeth. “I would think after what Camille is capable of, you would be helping us, I mean Warlocks are different-“

“Than Vampires?” Magnus asked sharply. “Let me make something crystal clear.” He dropped the glamor on his eyes, staring right at her. “I am a Downworlder no matter how often I help you. You overlook it because you like me, but if you really think about it, I was _always_ what I am, at least Vampires were Mundanes first and something happened to them, but I was born part demon and I will _never_ turn my back on another innocent Downworlder because you high and mighty Nephilim think they’re not important. My oldest friend died for you Nephilim and not a day later you, Miss Priss, nearly killed Raphael.”

Isabelle shook her head. “Magnus, we’re your friends-“

“I’ve known you for _weeks_!” he shouted angrily, eyes flashing again. “I have known Raphael Santiago for more than half a century, so if you think for a second the fact I fell in love with one of you Nephilim would ever make me choose you over him you’re wrong. So Simon is staying with me,” he said with finality. “Raphael made me promise to protect him so I’m going to protect him. I am the High Warlock of Brooklyn,” he reminded her. “If I say that Simon Lewis is under my protection, then _Simon Lewis is under my protection_.”

Clary opened her mouth but Simon shook his head. “No, he’s right,” he said, stepping over to stand beside Magnus. “Look, Clary…” He swallowed hard. “I know you- all of you, even Jace- don’t think Downworlders are all scum. I know you want to do the right thing. But it’s something ingrained in you that you have to deal with,” he pointed out. “When Camille kidnapped me, the only reason you got me back is because Raphael saved me. And when I thought I was turning into a vampire, you didn’t even answer my calls,” Simon said to Clary. “The reason I went back to the DuMort alone is because you wouldn’t pick up. You were busy with Shadowhunter stuff. And I know it was important, I know, but it doesn’t change that you picked Shadowhunter business over your best friend and I was murdered. And when Camille killed me, Raphael saved me again.” He looked at Alec. “You hated me as a Mundane so I know you have to hate me a lot now. And I know Jace wanted you to stake me when Raphael brought you my body,” he added. “And yeah you chose to bury me, but once I came out a vampire, you got busy again. Raphael helped me. Luke helped me. And Magnus is helping me now.” He looked around at all three of them. “You just… let me be around. When I needed help none of you were ever there really.”

Clary looked tearful and let out a breath. “Simon.”

“I’m a Downworlder, Clary.” He looked at Magnus and then back at her. “I’m a Vampire and you may love me, and I don’t regret saving Jocelyn because I love her, but Raphael did so much for me, over and over. He saved me so many times and you convinced me to do what I did because you guys matter so much to me and you didn’t think for a second about the consequences of it for me. And Isabelle, he is right. I was right there in that sun streak with all of my Clan,” he said to her. “I could’ve died all because you wanted to make a grand entrance. You didn’t think. I know you didn’t want to kill anybody, but you didn’t think.” He smiled sadly. “You’re trained to kill me. How am I supposed to be safe in a building full of people who were trained from childhood to hate me just because an evil bitch killed me?”

Magnus put a hand on his back with a smile. “Don’t worry, Simon. I’ll make sure you’re safe.” He looked at Clary, who looked like she was going to cry. “Look, Biscuit. I know you mean well. I know all of you really do mean well,” he added, looking at Isabelle and at Alec. “But there are things you don’t get yet. I have faith in you. Your generation of Shadowhunters is the first in a very long time that I can see doing the right thing.” He shook his head slowly. “But I’ve got to do what I can to protect my people, and whether you think of me as one or not, I’m a Downworlder and Vampires fall under the purview of ‘my people’. After Valentines men massacred so many of my Warlocks and I portaled the rest to the ends of the earth to save them, there are very few Warlocks left in this city. Vampires and Werewolves are the ones I have to worry about protecting now, and if a war between Vampires and Shadowhunters breaks out because one of your people hurts Simon it will tear everything apart.”

Alec looked at Simon and then to Magnus. “Are you sure they would care about him? Don’t they want him dead?”

Magnus met his eyes and smiled weakly. “Raphael did what he had to for his people in ordering Simon and Camille be killed, but trust me when I say Raphael does not want him dead.”

“He doesn’t?” Simon asked weakly and Magnus gave him a sad smile, rubbing his arm comfortingly.

“Of course not.” He winked. “Pretty sure you can guess why,” he said and Simon blushed, looking away. 

“Oh.” Magnus looked back at Alec, who was looking at Simon with a surprised look. “So he… oh. That makes sense.” He looked back at Magnus, who raised an eyebrow, and blushed some, ducking his eyes. “Okay. Simon stays here.”

Clary made a sound of contempt. “But Alec-“

“If Raphael only gave that order to live up to the expectations of a good leader, but he secretly wants Simon protected, I’m not risking some stupid person at the Institute making a very poor choice,” he said simply. “Now we should go. Let Simon get settled.”

Magnus gestured to the wall. “I could portal you if you want?” he offered and Alec shook his head.

“No, we have things to do,” he said, and he waited until Clary and Isabelle stopped complaining and went to the door like he ordered. He stopped on his way past and looked at Magnus, who met his eyes uneasily. They still hadn’t resolved anything at all and he was sure this whole thing wasn’t helping. “I noticed what you said. Don’t think I didn’t,” he mumbled and Magnus was a bit unsure what he meant. “Can I come by later? We should talk,” he said, eyes wide in a way that always made Magnus want to give in to anything Alexander might ask of him.

“Sure. I need to go get blood for Simon but I’ll be home in a few hours. I probably won’t get to bed before dawn so don’t worry about it being too late,” he said with an unsteady smile. He wasn’t sure what Alec wanted to talk about so he wasn’t sure if he should be scared or not.

Alec just nodded. “I’ll call if I can’t make it,” he said, giving Simon a nod before he turned and left just as the girls did.

When they were gone, Simon cracked a grin at Magnus. “Dude, you totally didn’t realize you said that you love him in that rant, huh?” he asked, and Magnus’s brain and body came to a grinding halt as alarm sirens blared in his head and horror dawned on him as he recalled ‘in love with a Nephilim’ somewhere in his rant.

“Oh. Oh no,” Magnus squeaked and Simon just smiled brightly.

“Oh yes, you totally did.” He laughed and Magnus just groaned dramatically, dragging his feet as he shuffled to his bedroom, absolutely mortified.

~

Magnus laid sprawled on his couch while Simon warmed up blood in the microwave in his kitchen. “So you and Raphael… did you, you know,” he turned and wiggled his eyebrows in that direction. “Do it?”

Simon laughed awkwardly, shuffling in place. “Uh, why do you want to know?”

“Because!” Magnus sat up, hands on the couch on either sides of him. “I’ve known Raphael Santiago for _ages_ and I have never heard about him having sex. Ever. I wasn’t sure he knew what sex was.”

Simon rolled his eyes. “He’s a vampire, I can tell you from experience that all they seem to do is have sex. There’s a rule at the DuMort to not have sex or be naked in communal areas.” He made a face. “I’m not even sure why you couldn’t just say ‘don’t be naked’ and be done with it.”

Magnus gave him a smirk. “Oh you don’t have to get naked to have sex,” he teased, wiggling his eyebrows. “But really. _Raphael_?”

“Yeah,” Simon said with a heavy sigh. The microwave dinged and he got out his mug of blood, walking over to sit on the couch beside Magnus, looking down into the steaming cup. “I mean… I don’t know if it _meant_ anything. I mean nobody else knew so I don’t know if he meant anything, but he’s actually not a bad guy when he’s not showing off,” Simon said with a faraway look in his eyes and a sad smile on his lips. “He’s funny, if you can believe it. I mean we were sleeping together, but we didn’t just do it and go our separate ways. I got to know him hanging out in his room.”

Magnus hummed, shrugging. “Well, he’s the one who was very upset when he came here last night. He nearly took my head off because he thought I told you to break Camille out.” He shook his head. “I’ve never seen him care about anybody that way. He is a good leader who loves his people, but I’ve never known him to be involved with someone romantically. He must really care about you.”

Simon slumped further down in his seat. “Yeah, then I went and betrayed him. He hates me. And worst of all he probably could’ve told us where Camille’s uptown condo was anyways. I’m sure he knows all her hidey-holes. He was just fucking with Clary and Isabelle for fun probably. If I had asked him in private he’d probably have helped us.”

Magnus shook his head. “He didn’t know about that place. He would’ve warned me not to go to the restaurant three blocks over if he knew,” he comforted.

“Either way,” Simon said sadly. “He won’t forgive me. Not for Camille. She wants him dead. Worse, if she _does_ hurt him, it’ll be my fault. I can’t kill her because she’s my sire and I hate it because I want her dead. She’s horrible. She literally sexually assaulted me and I still can’t want her dead,” he said with a slump that had his chin on his chest.

Magnus reached out and patted his knee. “It’s okay, Dear, she kept me as a pet warlock and love slave for a few years about a century and a half ago. I know how manipulative she is. And she’s your sire. You can’t help that you don’t want her gone. Hell, I hate her and yet I still feel horrible that her death is the only way to end her reign of terror, you know?” Simon nodded. “And it may take a while for Raphael to come around, but you know what?” He smiled at Simon’s curious look. “We’re immortal, Simon. Time is on your side when it comes to him forgiving you. You can literally wait forever for him to take you back.”

There was a knock at the door and Magnus gave Simon an apologetic look as he stood up to go answer it. He was expecting Alec and Alec was what he got, but he was not expecting Alec to be changed into a soft looking black sweater and jeans that weren’t black. It was disarming to see Alexander, not Alec Lightwood after their recent issues. “Hi,” Alec said softly, eyes nervously avoiding Magnus’s. 

“Alexander, do come in,” Magnus said, sweeping his arm as he stepped out of the way. He looked over at Simon and nodded his head towards the hallway pointedly.

“Hey, Alec, Bye, Alec,” he said quickly as he hopped up and vampire-sped away to his new room.

Alec raised an eyebrow at Simon’s departure, but wandered further into the room, fidgeting some as he stood there, looking unsure of himself. “I guess… I mean we need to talk and there’s a lull tonight while everybody tries to wait and see what comes next. With Valentine, with Jace…” He trailed off, shrugging helplessly.

Magnus walked closer, unsure about touching Alec but knowing he had to do _something_ to comfort him. “I know I may not seem like his biggest fan, but I have faith that Jace is going to help you guys. He didn’t join him in earnest, you know that. He may have been under duress, but even then, he’ll use it as a way to get word to you guys and help from the inside.”

Alec nodded mutely. “I just-“ He finally looked up, meeting Alec’s eyes. “I wish I could feel him better. I was so stupid weakening our bond so I can’t feel him and I’m scared that- that the only time I’ll be sure he’s okay or not is if he dies and I feel _that_.”

Magnus shook his head, stepping even closer to Alec, careful not to touch him even if he wanted to be as close as he could to give him strength. “I won’t lie and say everything will be fine, but my little hissy fit at the girls earlier aside, I have more faith in you Shadowhunters than I have in generations before you. Jace will do the right thing and he will most likely come home safely.”

“I didn’t really come here for reassurance about Jace,” Alec said reluctantly and Magnus nodded patiently. “But thank you either way. I feel like you mean what you say all the time, so it doesn’t feel hollow like Izzy’s comforting nonsense.” Magnus smiled softly and Alec took a breath. “We never finished our conversation the other day. At the Institute.”

Magnus took a breath, steeling himself for rejection. “I meant what I said, Alexander. I could live for thousands of years, or I could die tomorrow. I know my immortality isn’t irrelevant, it’s a big deal and I can’t blame you for being uncertain about that.” He held his gaze. “But I want you to understand that all I have ever wanted in my entire life is for someone to want to stay with me as long as they can, and nobody ever has. The longest anybody ever stayed with me, while it was a long time, was still less than twenty years. I’m about four hundred years old and in my entire life, I’ve fallen in genuine love three times in the past.” He smiled weakly, his heart breaking a little because he knew he was pushing Alec away with his honesty. “I never blame anybody for leaving me, Alexander. There’s a reason I’ve spent nearly a century closing myself off to feeling anything. The last person I loved was with me for seventeen years and then decided she wanted a life I couldn’t give her, and even though it _broke me_ I never blamed her. And I won’t blame you if you decide to not give me a chance, because I understand that it’s so much to ask someone.” He gave a wet laugh. “But I felt like you seem to think _I_ would get tired of someone when they get old on me, and I want you to understand that is my deepest desire. To have someone stay with me until they’re old and gray, to still want me even though I can’t grow old with them.”

Alec looked down at the floor, taking a breath that made his shoulders move. “I could die any day now, Magnus. I probably won’t get old. Most of us don’t.” He looked up, curling his arms together over his chest. “I didn’t mean you would get tired when I said what I said,” he explained, looking at Magnus’s eyes. “I meant that I don’t know if I feel okay with being the person who gets old and dies and leaves you brokenhearted. I’m not sure if I can handle knowing my entire life that every day is one step closer to making you feel that kind of pain.”

“Everybody lives with that chance,” Magnus countered breathlessly. “Alexander, _everybody_ is going to die one day. Even I will eventually be killed by something. I may not age and die, but if nobody heals me when I’m hurt or sick I will die the same as you. Every mundane couple who are in a lasting relationship eventually grow old and one of them dies first. Hopefully,” he amended. “Simon’s mother has been a widow for nearly a decade because his father was sick,” he said and Alec looked surprised.

“I didn’t know Simon didn’t have a dad,” he commented and Magnus nodded.

“The point is that that part is inevitable. Even if I aged, and if everything was perfect and I got married to someone and we had children and grandchildren and maybe even great-grandchildren, one day I would either lose them or they would lose me.” He smiled sadly. “You Shadowhunters don’t have that happen as often, I understand, but for normal people, they all watch someone they love age and die. Parents, friends, siblings, and lovers. I’m _old_ ,” he stressed. “I’ve lived long enough that most of the people I knew have aged and died besides vampires and warlocks and the ones who were killed. And back when I was young, ‘age and die’ meant a lot less time than it does now, let me tell you,” he said with a small smile, trying to lighten things up. “Where I was born, the average life expectancy was about thirty-five, so you would be on your way out already.”

Alec rolled his eyes and smiled in spite of himself. “Magnus, seriously,” he said with a small huff of laughter.

Magnus grinned, happy to see a smile on Alec’s face as his own face lost some of its tension. “I’m just being honest.” He held Alec’s gaze, his smile softening. “There are so many things besides the prospect that _if_ we work out in the long run, and _if_ we aren’t both killed in the coming months, I will eventually watch you grow old and die that you should think about, Alexander.” He shrugged. “For all we know, I could just be the conveniently interested guy in a sea of straight people and if we try dating, you will decide you don’t even like me.”

Alec gave him a look. “Now _that_ is far more ridiculous than anything you’ve ever said to me,” he said and Magnus scoffed.

“You’d be surprised. A lot of repressed gay people latch onto the first person that shows a hint of being interested just as an outlet. It’s not their fault. It just happens-“

Alec startled him into trailing off as he stepped into his space and, to Magnus’s utter surprise, raised a hand to touch his face as Magnus stared up at him with wide eyes. “As _insane_ as it sounds even to myself, Magnus, you casually mentioning that you love me is not the first time I realized that I’ve fallen in love with you, that just gave me the kick in the ass I needed to realize that I’m not being completely crazy.” He smiled nervously, hand still on Magnus’s cheek. “You’re not an ‘outlet’ to me, Magnus. As ridiculous as it should be, I’m pretty sure I fell in love with you the night we sat up drinking together. I repressed it so hard because I had a duty and being gay was my biggest weakness.”

“Alec,” he breathed in wonder and Alec leaned down, lips brushing the cheek his hand wasn’t touching. 

“I was never going to say anything this soon, but I get the feeling you didn’t mean to say it today either,” he whispered and Magnus laughed breathlessly.

“I was at least going to wait until after our first date,” he joked, and Alec laughed against his cheek as he carefully rested his other hand on Magnus’s hip.

“Can I?” Alec asked, and Magnus reached out, putting his hands on Alec’s chest to reassure him. He lifted his head to look up into Alec’s eyes and Alec closed the gap between them, brushing his lips across the corner of Magnus’s lips. “It’s too late for me to try and stop before one of us gets hurt, Magnus. And the way things are going, I’d rather put myself first for once just in case I don’t make it through this war. I do so much for my people and for my family, but I just really want to be selfish and let myself love you.”

Magnus gave a bright smile, sliding his hands from Alec’s chest to his shoulders, walking his fingers around Alec’s neck to pull him closer, standing on his tiptoes so they could be chest to chest, arms around each other. “Whether we have the next few hours or the next few decades, I just want the chance to love you, Alexander.” He kissed him sweetly, hand sliding into Alec’s hair.

Alec grinned against his lips, leaning their foreheads together. “I’ll never admit it in front of anybody else, but I love when you call me that.”

Magnus hummed. “My Alexander.”

Alec sighed, stepping back just a little, though he kept his hands on Magnus’s waist. Magnus pouted at him when he moved away but Alec just gave him a nervous look. “About Clary and Izzy at the DuMort,” he started and Magnus winced. “You were right to yell at them,” he said quickly before Magnus could apologize. “And I know I’m just as bad, if not worse,” he admitted, ducking his head. “I really do believe that Downworlders are just as much people as we are, but I’m pretty aware that I’m terrible at actually carrying through with that mentality.” He met Magnus’s eyes uneasily. “If I ever say something that’s stupid, Shadowhunter superiority stuff, call me out on it, okay? I need help not being a jerk sometimes.”

Magnus couldn’t help the way his insides turned to mush at how earnest Alec looked at that moment. He was such a good person. “Being aware of your prejudices is the most important part, Darling. Also you can always count on me to try and guide you into being a better person.” He winked. “Although you’re pretty darn great as it is.”

Alec blushed some but stepped into a hug, holding Magnus against him as he pressed his lips to the side of Magnus’s head. “Thank you for not giving up on me,” he whispered and Magnus shook his head, hugging Alec close.

“Never, Alexander.” He pulled back some, looking up into his eyes. “Hey, can you stay a while? Or do you need to leave?”

Alec shook his head. “I’ll stay for a while if you want. It’s only a few hours from dawn. With all that’s going on out there, I should probably wait until daylight to get going. Demons are less likely to attack me while we’re all distracted from normal patrols once it’s dawn.” Alec grinned flirtatiously and leaned down, pressing a kiss to the skin just in front of his ear. “Why? What’d you have in mind?” he whispered, pressing clumsy kisses along his jaw.

Magnus giggled some as Alec’s hair tickled his ear, making him shiver and pull away. “Well not that,” he said, tugging Alec by his hand over to the couch. He fluttered a hand over his chest as Alec fell into the seat beside him. “Why Alexander, what do you take me for? Buy a guy a drink first,” he joked and Alec smiled shamelessly, throwing his arm across the couch behind Magnus’s shoulders.

“What happened to ‘we could both die tomorrow’, Magnus?” he teased and Magnus flapped a hand at him, pulling his knees up on to the couch, facing Alec more.

“I’m not gonna say ‘I’m not that kinda boy’ because that would be a lie most of the time, but we’ve done this whole relationship backwards, Darling, I think at least one part of dating we should do properly,” he said with a playful wink. “You gotta take me out on a date before you get to take me out of my pants,” he joked and Alec laughed in surprise at his terrible humor.

“Alright, a date it is then.” Alec gave him a dramatic sigh. “I sure hope you plan on telling me how the hell a date works, then,” he said and Magnus cooed.

“Awww, you haven’t even been on a _date_ before? Not even fake ones with girls to fool your parents?” he asked and Alec shook his head.

Alec shrugged, reaching down to catch Magnus’s hand in his, laying Magnus’s hand out flat on his upturned hand, examining his bejeweled fingers. “My parents never cared I didn’t date. I’m shy enough they just bought the cold, hard fighter thing. Besides,” he said with a little shrug. “I didn’t mind. You’re the first person to make me look at you and want without shoving it down. And even with you, I had that period of shoving it down, I just lost my focus sometimes. Like that first time you called me to ask me out for a drink. I should’ve been all ‘what, no, you’re a warlock dude’ but what did I do? I said it might be fun sometime.” He rolled his eyes. “I was slipping because of you.”

Magnus leaned his head on Alec’s shoulder, smiling up at his adorable face. “It’s okay. It doesn’t have to be a high-pressure date. Just reservations at an impossible to pronounce named restaurant will do,” he teased and Alec scoffed.

“If that’s what you expect you’re shit out of luck,” he said and Magnus laughed lightly. “But, there’s this diner I like we could go to. Jace and Izzy don’t actually know I go there. The have the best black coffee in the city.”

Magnus nodded approvingly. “Something casual sounds wonderful, especially if I get to see you in clothes like these,” he said, rubbing his cheek against the soft fabric of Alec’s sweater. “My goodness, I nearly fainted when I saw you in a sweater and jeans that are blue. I didn’t know you owned anything that isn’t black.”

Alec grinned conspiratorially. “I’ll really blow your mind when I show up for our date, then. I own an entire outfit that has no black in it at all,” he said dramatically and Magnus hummed happily, nuzzling his shoulder.

“Oooh that sounds nice. My beautiful Alexander dressing up for me. You’re sweet.” He wiggled his eyebrows. “If you play your cards right I might even give you a kiss at the doorstep when you bring me home,” he teased.

Alec leaned in, pecking his lips. “What like that?” He grinned. “Or more like…” he trailed off as he tipped Magnus’s chin up with his fingertip and met his lips solidly, slowly, gently, and very clearly nervously giving him a _real_ kiss. 

For someone who, Magnus suspected, had only ever kissed him, Alec had to be merited for giving it his best shot. He wasn’t the best kisser by far, but he didn’t hold back from trying. Magnus guided him as he leaned into Magnus, the kiss growing more involved, and he was quite the quick study. Within a few minutes, Magnus was biting back soft moans as Alec’s tongue traced along the inside of his lip, sending shivers down his spine. Alec had pulled him until he was halfway in his lap, so Magnus decided to commit and slid his leg across Alec’s thighs, pulling himself onto Alec’s legs. He shivered when Alec groaned into his mouth, his own fingers tightening in Alec’s dark, soft hair. They both were breathing hard between kisses, unable to pull themselves apart for more than the fraction of a second it took to suck in some air.

It was only the sound of a throat clearing that brought Magnus back to his senses and he jerked back, looking over Alec’s shoulder to see Simon bringing his mug back. “Uh, sorry guys.” He waved awkwardly as he headed past them to the kitchen. “I would say ‘carry on’,” he said loudly so they could hear over the quick sound of running water before he came back. “But vampire hearing is really strong. I can hear you two panting like you’ve ran a mile from my room with the music on. Can we please add ‘ear-plugs’ to the list of things I need if you two are gonna be… you know.” He gestured to Magnus’s bedroom. “That.”

Magnus blushed as he slid off of Alec’s lap and Alec wasn’t much better, his ears aflame as he avoided Simon’s gaze. “Sorry, Simon. We sorta got carried away. I’ll get you some and then find that sound-proof warding I have somewhere around here so we can fix your room up,” he promised.

Simon smiled sadly. “I understand, I just really don’t need to hear you two boning, thanks,” he said, trying to joke as he walked back to his room, though his shoulders slumped took away from the attempt.

When he was gone Alec let out a pained cringe. “So, Simon and Raphael…”

Magnus nodded slowly. “Simon says he didn’t know if it was a ‘thing’ because they never talked about the fact they were sleeping together and hanging out in private, but I’ve known Raphael Santiago since he was a fledgling like Simon and Raphael doesn’t take lovers. He is so business all the time I’m surprised he was sleeping with anybody, and if he was doing it repeatedly and showing some of himself to Simon when they weren’t having sex, that’s a big deal.” He shook his head. “And when he was here, he was so upset. He was heartbroken. Raphael must’ve found something in Simon he’s never found before, because this had him totally wrecked.” He slumped some. “Oh Camille. What a life-ruining bitch even after all this time.” 

Alec tensed ever-so-slightly and looked at Magnus. “The other day. With Camille.”

Magnus winced. “Alexander, I promise you, as stupid as it sounds, she kissed me just as you were walking in with the express purpose of you seeing it. I did not want her so much as touching me.”

Alec looked at him closely but then nodded. “I know, Magnus. I trust you but that doesn’t change that you loved her once.”

“I did,” Magnus said softly, glancing over to the chair where he had sat with the ghost of Ragnor in his mind pouring over the old photographs. “As you have discovered firsthand, I get attached far too easily,” he said with a weak smile. “Falling for you in a matter of weeks, being so attached to Clary because I saw her for a few hours every once in a while as she grew up, befriending your sister within a few minutes of meeting her.” He shrugged. “I have this horrible habit of meeting people and just getting so attached to them. When I met Camille, she was seeing Werewolf and I told her to spend the rest of his life with him because she and I had eternity to find one another again.” He smiled bitterly. “We did find one another again, and I then spent a few years of my life bowing and scraping and basically allowing her to make me her bitch just because I thought she loved me the way I loved her. She destroyed me in every way possible. She broke me down and made me into something that is not Magnus Bane. She just…” He shook his head. “I loved her so much and she is so cold and so empty that she thinks that immortals aren’t meant to love. She thinks it’s a joke. The whole time I was breaking bits of me off just to keep her interested, she was off seeing other people while I stayed at her house and waited for her.” He met Alec’s eyes with a weak shrug. “She broke my heart and I just- I just can’t help being afraid of her. I hate her and I don’t feel any of the love I once felt for her, not even a lingering bit of wistful ‘what if’, I _hate_ her.” He shuddered. “But I know she can turn my life into a living hell the way she has before. She wanted you to see me kissing her because she had just worked out that I thought I had found love again and she thinks it’s amusing.”

Alec pulled him close again, holding him comfortingly. “And she did the same to Simon. She used him just to mess with Raphael.”

Magnus nodded. “Yup,” he said, lips popping on the ‘p’. “She’s just a monster and I don’t like for people to have to die, even the most horrible people I would rather see alive and just locked away, but she just has no good she can possibly do and an eternity of bad. She played her last hand, and this time, when she dies instead of escapes, I won’t care. I won’t give a shit that she’s gone. She almost cost me you after I spent so long going without even the hope for something more than an empty fuck,” he said, tugging at Alec’s fingers playfully. He tipped his face up, smiling up at Alec. “Not that there’s anything wrong with just having sex, don’t mistake me for saying bad things about your sister,” he added and Alec grinned, rolling his eyes. “I just prefer being with one person who can give me so much more than just sex.”

“Trust me, nobody who knows about your reputation will think you have negative views of sleeping around,” he joked. “It’s cool. I’m used to defending Izzy’s choices to assholes who call her a slut when they think nobody is around to hear them. Just because I don’t do it doesn’t mean I have any problem with it. People like sex, so why not do it? We spend all our lives fighting demons and risking death at every turn. We deserve to do whatever the hell we want the rest of the time, don’t you think?” he asked and Magnus pecked his cheek.

“Yep. You punch stuff that can’t fight back, Izzy brings men to their knees, and Jace…” He hummed.” What the hell does Jace do for fun?” he asked and Alec scoffed.

“His hair, usually,” he said and Magnus burst out laughing, unable to help himself. 

Magnus laid his head against Alec’s chest, shaking his head. “Oh Darling, I fully believe that. Your brother is as picky with his look as I am, isn’t he?” He winked. “You’re still the better looking one.”

They sat together a while longer before the sun began to creep above the horizon and it was time for Magnus to get some sleep and Alec to leave. Magnus shuffled tiredly as he walked Alec to the door. Alec turned back at the top of the stairs and Magnus leaned in for one last hug. “You better take me on that date, soon. I want to see you as much as I can before the inevitable fallout from recent events.”

Alec nodded, holding him as he kissed the side of his head. “Promise,” he said, then pecked his jaw, lowering his lips to whisper in his ear. “Besides, the world might be ending any day now and I really don’t want to die a virgin,” he purred and Magnus whined dramatically as Alec pulled away, giving him a teasing grin.

“That’s so unfair,” Magnus whined, feeling as if he’d been punched in the gut. He pushed Alec playfully. “Go! Leave! I’m gonna dream dirty, sexy things now and it’s all your fault.”

Alec just grinned. “You’re welcome,” he joked, smiling far more brightly, honestly, and _Alec_ than Magnus could ever remember seeing on him before on the way out Magnus’s door. 

~

Magnus had gone out with Alec so Simon was alone when Raphael showed up unannounced, walking through the balcony doors. Simon shouted fearfully, scrambling to his feet from the couch to face them when the doors opened inwards, but when he saw Raphael, he froze. Raphael stopped in surprise, eyes wide, hands on the door. “Why are you here?” he asked quickly, and Simon gulped.

“I- I’m staying with Magnus. He- he said-“

“I wasn’t supposed to see you,” Raphael said suddenly, taking a heavy breath. “I’m not supposed to know where you are.”

Simon’s heart leapt with the slightest hope. “Magnus is letting me stay here because you told him to protect me,” he said in a small voice. “Also… I’m a Downworlder so he didn’t want me at the Institute with all those Shadowhunters.”

Raphael scoffed, looking up as he let the doors go, crossing his arms over his chest. “So now you are a Downworlder.”

Simon nodded slowly, looking down. “I- I guess I remembered who I am a little too late,” he said with a sad smile, trying for levity. “Magnus was right to keep me. I trust Clary but she has other priorities besides me. And Izzy doesn’t think before she does things sometimes. And Alec is probably okay, but he hated me even before I was a Vampire. Jocelyn and Luke might would take me in, but with the Clan after me, they would come after Luke and the other werewolves and I don’t want to start some stupid war over me,” he finished softly, looking up at Raphael. “Magnus is a good guy. And if anybody can understand my issues with Camille, it’s him.”

“You know she will die,” Raphael said and Simon nodded.

“I know, and I- I want her to.” He shuddered. “I really do. I just- I can’t. She did so much to me but I just can’t- I can’t-“

“You cannot fight the bond with your sire,” Raphael said in a heavy tone, shaking his head. “I know. I know you can’t.”

Simon looked at him searchingly. “I’m sorry I betrayed you and my Clan, but I’m not sorry I found that book we needed. Jocelyn is awake and safe.” He shook his head. “I lost my dad already. Jocelyn is almost as much a mom as my mom is and I couldn’t go through losing another parent. I don’t know if you can understand why I can’t be sorry she’s okay, but if there had been any other way and if Camille hadn’t been the one, I wouldn’t have ever went behind your back or ruined my relationship with the Clan.”

“ _Mierda_ ,” Raphael groaned, rubbing a hand over his face. “Why are you telling me this?”

“Because it’s the truth?” Simon offered. He looked down at his feet. “Are you going to kill me now?” he asked in a weak voice. “Magnus isn’t here. He wouldn’t know-“

“ _Shut up_!” Simon startled because suddenly, without Simon even hearing, Raphael was right there in front of him, inches from his face. “Don’t you dare-“ Simon flinched away when Raphael raised a hand, but Raphael just made a pained sound and touched his face. Simon opened one eye fearfully, only to see an utterly broken look in Raphael’s eyes. “Baby,” he whispered and Simon barely had time to blink both eyes before he was being kissed within an inch of his life. Simon squeaked but Raphael had him in his arms and was kissing him with so much vigor Simon’s lip was nicked by Raphael’s fangs. Simon’s hands scrabbled at Raphael’s jacket as Raphael pulled him close, one hand on his hip and the other tugging at his hair. Simon was confused and a little scared but mostly shocked. “Why would I ask Magnus to protect you if I came here to kill you?” Raphael demanded, panting against Simon’s mouth, their foreheads touching. “I should fucking hate you for doing this to me,” he ground out and Simon nodded weakly. “How do I choose between doing what is right by my people and wanting to protect you? You fucking did this-“

“I had to choose between you and the Clan and my other family, Raphael, you think I wanted that?” he asked, voice trembling. “ _Rafa_ ,” he sobbed, chest heaving as he fought not to cry. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he said, shaking his head roughly, hands tangled in Raphael’s lapels. “I’m sorry.”

Raphael pulled him into his arms fully, shaking his head. “Shhhhh, Simon, don’t,” he demanded, kissing him again. “No, Baby, no-“

“I couldn’t find a better way,” he whimpered, pressing his face into Raphael’s hair. “I had to-“

“ _Cállate_ , Baby,” Raphael stressed, kissing him fiercely. “Shhhhh, Simon it’s okay. Please don’t cry,” he pleaded, cupping Simon’s face in his hands. “Please don’t.” He kissed him more intently and Simon whined against his lips, kissing back desperately just in case Raphael decided to let him go. 

~

Magnus loved kissing Alexander. Currently, Alec had him pressed up against the door to his apartment and _damn_ he was enthusiastic even if he wasn’t that well practiced. He was _big_ and strong and Magnus was pretty sure his feet weren’t even holding his bodyweight, Alec’s hold on him was so strong. Magnus scrambled behind him to open the door, falling inwards from the force of Alec’s kisses. He giggled when he slipped and Alec held him up, the two of them stumbled into the room. He walked backwards, still kissing Alec. He only stopped as he was turning around to take off his jacket while Alec shut the door.

He barely grabbed the button on his jacket when he spotted the person on his couch and yelped in alarm, jumping back a few feet before he realized it was Raphael. He clutched his chest. “Jesus Christ, Raphael!” He looked to the left and saw Alec had a seraph blade in his hand even though he was lowering it. He raised an eyebrow at him. “Really? You took that on our _date_?” he asked and Alec shrugged unapologetically, making Magnus roll his eyes.

He turned back to Raphael, who was sitting on his couch with his shirt unbuttoned and his sleeves rolled up. He raised an eyebrow at him and Raphael looked up at Alec pointedly. Magnus sighed, turning to Alec. “Darling, I need to be a good friend right now,” he said apologetically.

Alec nodded. “Do you want me to go or just go to another room?” he asked, seeming totally ready to do either one, which Magnus found endearing. 

Magnus glanced back at Raphael, and felt a bit like a terrible friend when he nodded at his bedroom and winked. “Just wait for me.” He lowered his voice when Alec passed him. “Without your pants on.”

“I’m a Vampire, you ass,” Raphael said loudly and Alec flushed as he rushed to Magnus’s room and shut the door. 

Magnus turned around and shrugged shamelessly. “Don’t care, you’re lucky I’m a good friend and am willing to listen to your problems.” He sat down in the chair across from the couch and raised an eyebrow at Raphael’s open shirt and rolled up sleeves. “Why are you half-dressed?” He looked around suddenly. “Oh God, you didn’t kill Simon did you?” he asked, glaring at Raphael. “Oh my God Alec is going to kill you and I’ll have to break up with him for killing my friend-“

“Simon is asleep,” Raphael said hoarsely. He smiled the most heartbreaking smile Magnus had ever seen on his face – and that was saying a lot given the way they met – and looked down at his hands. “Thank you. For keeping him safe from those Shadowhunters. I didn’t expect you to let him stay here, but that is nice of you.”

Magnus tilted his head. “Are you okay? Also how do you know Simon’s asleep? Did you talk to him?” he asked and Raphael looked up at him with shame in his eyes. Magnus took in his disheveled look and his shame and sat back in his chair with a groan. “ _Raphael_.” He shook his head. “You can’t keep sending that kid mixed signals. One day you order everybody to kill him and the next you fuck him, come on!”

“I know,” Raphael said weakly. “But I love him,” he said, looking up at Magnus with wide, pained eyes. “I love him but I can’t rescind the order. Not until Camille is found and taken care of at least. As long as she is out there, I need my people united behind me. I cannot let my feelings control how I care for my entire Clan.”

Magnus just stared at him, wide eyed. “Whoaaaa. You _love_ him?” He blinked. “Raphael, you don’t love people. What the fuck?”

Raphael chuckled weakly. “I have no idea. And _him_ ,” he stressed, looking into the distance. “Even when he was the Mundane that Camille kidnapped, I was so… annoyed by him.” He made a face. “He never stops talking and he’s so strange, but I was mostly annoyed by how much it didn’t actually annoy me. He is just so different. And when she killed him, she had no intention of turning him. She gave him her blood, yes, but she just tossed him aside. Asked me to ‘get rid of the body’,” he said, shuddering. “I hated her so much. I had never liked her, but I _hated_ her. She killed him just because she thought it was funny to hurt someone the Shadowhunters cared about. He was young and afraid and actually very smart, and she did the same thing to him my maker did to me, only she _didn’t even care_. She didn’t have some horrible plan, she just wanted to watch him die.” He rocked some with the intensity of his hatred towards Camille. “I took him to the redhead because for some reason, I just couldn’t bear to toss him in the river when he was such a vibrant person and people loved him. Clary Fray loves him, his family loves him, your Shadowhunter friends may be stupid, but they do love him.” He chuckled weakly. 

“And when he turned he became something so beautiful.” He looked up at Magnus. “Have you ever seen what becoming a Vampire does to a Mundane? Have you ever seen any of us before we turn?” Magnus shook his head. “He was a cute kid, nothing that special without his amusing personality.” He let out a reverent breath. “But when he awoke and fed, he looked up at me and he was something so wild and beautiful. Everything about him, it became _more_. He’s just as amusing and twice as annoying, but he has this grace, like he was born to be one of us. He is still not the best Vampire, he is a fledgling who has only accepted minimal training, but he makes the whole Clan brighter. We all found him frustrating and annoying, and yet he was _ours_.” Raphael sighed. “And then now without him and with Camille out there… everything is wrong with my family. And everything is wrong with me. I want him with me always. I want him at my side. I have never wanted to spend every day sleeping next to someone, I have never wanted to spend every night teaching someone or learning from someone the way I do him, and I have never felt _love_ for someone the way I love him, Magnus.” He looked at his friend and shook his head. “I don’t know how you ever survive this feeling. Every day that he is not with me and I remember that he betrayed us, I feel like a part of me dies. If we cannot find Camille and I have to continue to be without him and to not convince my people to let him return, I don’t know what I will do.”

Magnus nodded solemnly. “When your heart is breaking, that is generally what it feels like. It’s horrible, but you live through it. I promise.”

Raphael laughed humorlessly. “I need to leave and yet the thought of going through that door and leaving him behind is _excruciating_. If I lose him-“ He swallowed hard. “If I lose him I am not sure I would not choose to watch my final sunrise, Magnus.”

Magnus’s stomach dropped. He hadn’t heard Raphael say anything even slightly suicidal in over fifty years. “Raphael…” Magnus shook his head. “I won’t let anybody hurt him, I promise. But please don’t talk like that.” He stood up, going to Raphael’s side. When he sat he put a hand on Raphael’s shoulder, something he and Raphael were not really the type of friends to do, and gave him a sad smile. “I have lost most of my Warlocks, the rest I had to hide around the world and may never see again, and my oldest friend was just killed. Please, don’t you talk about leaving me, too. I couldn’t bear to lose anybody else.”

Raphael gave him a small smile. “Protect my lover and you will not have to, Bane,” he teased and Magnus laughed softly, nodding. Raphael sighed heavily. “I must go, now. I have things to do before the sun comes up.”

Magnus stood when Raphael did, walking to the door with him. “You know, I’m surprised you trust me with him. I’m in love with a Shadowhunter, so I’m shocked you don’t want me nowhere near Simon.”

Raphael shook his head, clapping Magnus on the shoulder. “I will always trust you, Magnus. You are too good of a man to let even the ones you love most do something wrong when you can stop them. If that man of yours tried to hurt someone like Simon, you would protect Simon. Of that I am certain.” He smiled a genuine smile that made Magnus feel more love for his friend than he remembered. “Your heart is too big, my friend. Not the opposite.”

Magnus locked up behind Raphael and went to check on Simon just so that Raphael’s praise was not unfounded. His heart ached a little to see Simon asleep amongst the disheveled covers to his bed, arm reached out beside him for a person who was no longer there. Simon needed love and reassurance at a time like this, and instead he would wake up feeling for his lover only to find himself alone.

Magnus quietly shut the door and headed to his room finally. He knew he had been quite a while, but it was amusing to open his doors and see that Alexander had fallen asleep. He was lying on the bed in nothing but his boxers, clearly having gone for a ‘let’s save time’ method of waiting for Magnus to come and sleep with him, only he had fallen actually asleep instead.

After getting ready for bed, Magnus simply crawled onto the bed beside Alec and snapped the covers from beneath them to on top of them. Yes, he had been excited at the prospect of ‘I love you and the world may be ending’ sex – not to mention his nerves about giving Alec a good first time – but after his talk with Raphael he was emotionally drained and he wasn’t really in the mood for sex anyways. He wanted to hold and be held, nothing more, nothing less. He lay his cheek against Alec’s chest and cuddled into his side, content to let the thump of Alexander’s heartbeat lull him to sleep. 

~

Alec woke up to an extremely cuddly armful of sleepy Magnus and couldn’t help watching him sleep for more than a few moments. He looked so sweet in his sleep (not that he didn’t look sweet a lot of the time). Eventually, his bladder won out over his desire to hold Magnus in his arms and just look at him, so he carefully pulled out of Magnus’s clinging limbs and left the bedroom to go pee. 

When he came out of the bathroom, he saw the light on in the other bedroom so he decided to just make sure Simon was okay and someone hadn’t snuck in and kidnapped him or worse. When he pushed the door open, however, Simon, who was sitting in bed with his arms crossed across the tops of his knees, looked up at him. “Oh, sorry. I just saw the light,” Alec apologized. Simon just shrugged, looking down at the bed again without saying anything. Alec expected at least some jab at him having spent the night, but Simon seemed far too quiet. “Look…” He made a decision and walked into the room some, standing at the foot of the bed with his arms crossed uncomfortably. “I don’t like you, and I know you don’t like me,” he started and Simon snorted, rolling his eyes. “But… are you okay?”

Simon grinned in amusement. “Man I must really look like shit if you’re voluntarily asking about my wellbeing.” Alec rolled his eyes, but didn’t say anything so Simon just shook his head. “Physically, yeah. I’m not being kidnapped or murdered. I’m okay.”

Alec nodded. “Even though Raphael was here last night? He didn’t hurt you or anything?”

Simon laughed weakly, looking down at his knees. “Raphael won’t hurt me.”

Alec raised an eyebrow. “Really, because last I remember he ordered you to be killed.”

“He had to,” Simon said in a strained whisper. “I can’t go back to my Clan. I betrayed them and his direct orders and he has to do what’s best for our people. But he wouldn’t hurt me.”

Alec winced. “I guess I understand the whole ‘gotta do what’s best for everybody’ thing,” he admitted and Simon shrugged.

“You made the right choice to be selfish. He can’t be selfish and it be the right thing. He could _die_ because I let her go. If she decides she wants her spot back she just has to kill Raphael,” he said simply. “If she hurts him I’ll never forgive myself. I did what I had to do for Jocelyn and I can’t regret that, but Raphael had to do what he did as well.”

Alec nodded slowly. “So… you two, huh?” he asked, and Simon gave him a pointed look. Alec grinned in spite of himself, too amused to help it. “Dude, he gave the order to kill you and then he shows up and you just have sex with him? What the hell? He’s attractive but nobody’s _that_ hot.”

“Maybe I like to live dangerously?” Simon joked poorly, shaking his head when Alec’s smile slid away. “It’s just weird. Being a Vampire makes some things just so much more intense.”

Alec made a face. “Ew, wow, I never needed to-“

“No that, you pervert,” Simon said, rolling his eyes. “Just the bond you have with someone. I mean vampires don’t all have the feelings I do for our leader, obviously, but even when I wanted to hate him I felt safe with him. And it’s not like the bond with Camille because she made me, that just means I hate her but can’t actually want her dead. With Raphael it was like a reluctant crush that was so much deeper and then when we got together… I dunno.” He shrugged. “It’s just weird. It’s like I belong with him and he belongs with me. It feels wrong to not be with the Clan and to not be with him. He came to see Magnus but when I was there instead, he couldn’t even be angry at me for more than a minute, because he misses me the same way I miss him.”

Alec nodded. “Okay. Well, as long as he won’t hurt you I guess it’s none of my business,” he said simply.

Simon smirked suddenly, winking. “Not unless I ask nicely he won’t,” he drawled and Alec groaned, making a face.

“Alright, goodbye, never speak to me again,” he said as he turned and left just as quietly as he had entered the room. 

When he got back to Magnus’s room, he was too awake to go back to sleep, so instead he went to get his shoes so that he could go get Magnus his favorite drink from Starbucks, so that he could wake up to that instead of Alec creepily staring at him for an hour.

~

There was a lot of odd things that came with living with Magnus. The oddest being that he was oddly cheerful all the time. Simon had never met someone who had so much heavy shit in their life but faked it like nobody’s business. He also was strangely lonely. Simon knew Magnus’s reputation as a party animal, but since Valentine’s return all the Warlocks were gone from the city, and even though his club was still going strong, Magnus never had time to go these days. He was always working on something for clients. And the one time they both went to Pandemonium, even though he was laughing and drinking and hanging out with all of these flashy people, whenever Simon looked at him in the eyes it seemed like Magnus didn’t really enjoy being with any of those people. 

Simon found himself coming out to hang out with Magnus in the living room more than spending time alone in his room simply because Magnus seemed excited when Simon wanted to do something with him, like he was the only friend Magnus had at the moment. He could imagine that since he had a boyfriend the random people at the club he probably would’ve normally had meaningless sex with were not as fun as they used to be, and with his people in hiding his real ‘family’ was gone. Simon had heard about Magnus’s friend dying, and he knew from Raphael explaining the past Magnus had with Camille that he only had a few real friends that had known him a long time. Isabelle was always busy, Clary was never free, and even Alec seemed to never have time to do more than visit Magnus.

Magnus was very clearly a lonely person, so Simon didn’t even argue when Magnus asked if he could paint his nails. Magnus was a great person and if green nails was what it took to make Magnus smile for once, Simon was down with that. “You know,” Simon said, watching Magnus work. “I did all I could to save Jocelyn and I still can’t go see her,” he commented. “Luke is always with her and I can’t risk the Werewolves going after the Vampires because Luke is angry at the order to kill I have on me. I still can’t be around my family because I’m not fully stable and I can’t explain to my mom and my sister what I am yet anyways.” He shrugged. “Seems like it’s just me and you sometimes, you know? Even as busy as you are, you’re the one that I see the most. Nobody else has time to come visit me but you have to come back. You’re kind of the only friend I have right now,” Simon admitted.

Magnus gave him a warm look that met his eyes in earnest. “I’m glad you think of me as your friend. I was really just ‘that guy’ to you before you moved in, so I wouldn’t hold it against you if you didn’t.”

“You’re probably the nicest person I know,” Simon said pointedly. “So it would be dumb if I didn’t think of you as a friend.” He shook his head. “And you don’t seem to have that many friends since all the Warlocks left and everybody else is so busy, so I should at least be your friend to thank you for protecting me.”

Magnus chuckled dryly. “I don’t have many actual friends period, my dear,” he admitted. “It wasn’t just falling in love I closed myself off to for so long. I was hurt so badly in the past I pretty much shut down any closeness I could feel for anyone. It’s alarming to me now how cold and aloof I made myself. Even my people, I loved them as a leader of sorts. Not as a family like I should have.” He made a face. “I don’t like who I was. I hate that I did that to myself. Especially now. After Ragnor…” He trailed off, shaking his head as he blinked a bit hard a few times. “Well,” he said, voice tight. “Catarina and Raphael are really all I have left. I care about Jocelyn and Clary, but we were never friends really.” He laughed a bit wetly, still trying to rid himself of the lingering emotions from bringing up his friends’ recent death. “Even if Alexander hadn’t chose me, I would still be grateful, even through the heartbreak, that he woke up the part of me that’s _me_. I forgot that not feeling pain also means not feeling much of anything.” He shrugged. “I guess the best way to explain it is like self-imposed depression, of sorts. Apathy may prohibit pain but it isn’t worth it. I feel… so much,” he said with a deep breath he released with a laugh. “I always felt so much. And not feeling meant I had to repress so much of who I am, and now I feel overwhelmed sometimes.” He shrugged, finally moving to the other hand. “But it’s better. Pain is horrible, but it’s better to feel it than to not feel anything like I did for so long.”

Simon nodded. “I was like that when my dad died,” he admitted. “I was only ten, but I remember how everything hurt but I didn’t want to make things worse for my mom and my sister so I just pretended everything was fine until I stopped feeling anything really. I think I was in high school before I ever got past that ‘repress every emotion’ thing.” He rolled his eyes. “Doesn’t help that boys aren’t supposed to cry so when I finally did have sort of a breakthrough when I was fifteen and started getting emotional over everything, people laughed at me. I cried in class one time because we read this really sad story and I got picked on for basically the rest of high school.” He cringed. “Worse than I already did for being a nerd.”

Magnus scoffed. “Girls like a guy who cries, so the jokes on those jerks anyways. No woman wants some ‘I am an emotional brick’ asshole, so they probably got way less action that you anyways.”

Simon snorted. “Yeah, well, lately I’ve been with a dude so that was sort of pointless anyways.” He raised an eyebrow at him. “Besides, you fell for a guy with about as much emotional response as a pigeon.”

Magnus dismissed it with a wave. “Alexander has a lot of emotional depth, he’s just been raised as a warrior. Even Isabelle shows less emotion than I do and she’s as feminine as Shadowhunters come. Alec’s repressed, not unemotional. You see it when he’s with his sister more than anything,” he said with a warm look on his face. “Alexander would do anything for Isabelle. He’s such a good big brother. It’s one of my favorite things about him. Even if he nearly married a woman to protect her instead of me,” he added with a ‘what can you do’ shrug.”

Simon chuckled. “Let’s be honest, if he wasn’t incredibly male-oriented and in love with you, he wouldn’t have had that bad of a marriage with a badass like Lydia. She’s the female Alec,” he said and Magnus chuckled.

“She’s definitely the female Alec.” He made a face. “And she’s really hot,” he added and Simon laughed so hard he made Magnus paint the tip of his finger instead of his nail. 

“Well you aren’t wrong,” Simon said, grinning. “But nah, I get you about Alec. Sounds like Raphael. Raphael seems like he hates everybody but he really loves every single person in the Clan. He would die for any of them. He knows each person backwards and forwards. He even knows everybody’s birthdays and Vampires rarely celebrate those,” he stressed. “When I first met him I thought Raphael was just the average scary creature of the night, but he’s probably the most caring leader of any group of people ever.”

“Oh yeah,” Magnus said, nodding. “Raphael is a very nurturing person. He basically helped parent his brothers, even after he got turned. Also he’s the only religious Vampire I’ve ever known, so he has this weird way of taking ‘love thy neighbor’ very seriously. He is such a good leader because he cares so much. It doesn’t happen often, but every time he has ever lost a member of his Clan, he mourns them more than anybody else. I doubt there’s a Vampire he’s ever lost that he doesn’t remember every detail of. That’s one of the reasons I was so surprised about you,” he said, and Simon frowned. Magnus smiled sadly. “Raphael cares so much about everybody but he has never really been one to have anybody special. Hell, I’m not even sure he sleeps around like most Vampires do. You are the first lover I’ve ever known him to have because if he loves, he is going to love _so hard_.”

Simon chuckled weakly. “Well, he’s lying to his people to protect me, so that suggests that I matter quite a bit to him. I just didn’t know how much until all this happened.” He shook his head. “I don’t know him as well as I would like to, but I know he wants this to end without violence. He wants to be the one to stake Camille and end it and then bring me home and make sure they understand what happened and why I did what I did. I think he truly does understand why I had to save Jocelyn.”

“Of course he does,” Magnus comforted. “He probably has never mentioned it, but I met Raphael because of his mother. Even after he was turned, he visited his mother every Sunday until she passed, and he visited every one of his brothers until they passed. The last one died about a year ago, actually,” he commented. “He understands family. He understands better than any of us. The reason he won’t let you see your mom and sister is because he wants you to learn so that you can see them and not fear yourself. So trust me, he will convince them that you are not to blame for what Camille made you do when it was someone who was your family that was in danger.”

Simon smiled hopefully. “I just want to go home. I mean don’t get me wrong,” he said quickly. “This is awesome, you’re great and your place is super cool. But I miss the other Vampires. I was just getting to know them and I had just accepted what I am now. I miss my family, too, but I know my place is with my people. With the Vampires.”

Magnus nodded. “There is this bond that you develop with your own people. The shared experience. It forms this closeness that no other can match. I love Alexander with all my heart, but I will never fully understand Shadowhunters and he will never fully understand Warlocks. That’s not a problem, I mean no people in a relationship ever fully know each other’s life experiences. But I can love him for the rest of my life and still feel a bond with the Warlocks I will never have with him.”

Simon shook his head. “I don’t know how the hell anybody can understand the Shadowhunters. Clary sure as hell doesn’t. She’s slowly becoming just like them, but even she goes ‘what the fuck’ at some of their shit. It’s like a cult, man.”

“You aren’t wrong,” Magnus joked. “I’ve always liked them. Nephilim are something unique and interesting. I’ve had friends and enemies and loves who were Nephilim. But they are definitely something else. It’s almost like those cultures where they have child soldiers. They start training the Nephilim for combat at ten years old.” He shook his head. “I’ll tell you now, I could never put a weapon in a ten-year-old’s hands and say ‘learn how to kill something with this’.”

Simon grimaced. “No wonder Alec’s so repressed. He’s the biggest badass of all of them, so he probably already knew how to kill a person ten ways when he realized he liked boys.” He shook his head. “Dude, Magnus, I know you’re like the ultimate ‘actual adult’ but we’re just fucking kids over here. Clary _just_ turned eighteen. She may be a legal adult, but she was seventeen a month ago, you know? And I’m only a few months older than her. Isabelle, Alec, and Jace are all in their twenties, which I still pretty much think all people in their twenties agree is more child than adult. We’re just kids and the fate of the _world_ is in our hands. How fucked is that?”

Magnus gave him a look. “Why the hell do you think Valentine did so well last time? They were a bunch of kids being bad guys then. You kids are fucking insane, Simon. You guys go crazy and don’t think about the consequences. Nephilim especially, they go kill-happy in those ‘peak energy’ years. You kids will do just fine, don’t worry,” he teased, winking. “Raphael and I will be the old men cheering for you.”

“Somehow I bet you would totally become bickering old men if left together for too long,” Simon agreed. “I’m really happy Raphael has a friend like you,” Simon added unexpectedly. His brain caught up with his mouth and he smiled apologetically. “I just mean, he needs somebody outside of our Clan that he can trust to call him out on his shit and, even if you guys aren’t touchy feely, currently he is having to lie to the Clan so he just needs someone he can confide in. He values your opinion, I can tell.”

Magnus smiled sweetly. “Raphael is a loyal person and I will always value his loyalty. We may not be the most traditional friends, but I will always trust him and he can always trust me. I know he would choose the right thing over me and I would choose the right thing over him, and that is the most honorable friendship I can imagine, which is something I only know for a fact I share with him. He means a lot to me, and he knows it.”

Simon nodded contentedly. “I know, and I’m happy that someone else respects him the way I do.”

~

Simon and Magnus had both just got up – Magnus joining him in becoming nocturnal since he’d bene living there had only taken a few weeks – when banging on the door startled them both in the kitchen to the point that it was only magic and vampire speed that kept coffee and blood from mixing on the tile floor. 

“Stay here,” Magnus said, heading to the living room, blue sparks swirling around his fingertips as he crept closer to the door. Simon stood out of sight of the door, watching Magnus go closer to it, only to startle when the banging was accompanied by shouting.

“MAGNUS?! SIMON?!”

Magnus seemed just as startled and he rushed towards, the door, unlocking and opening it with magic before he got close. It flew wide and Alec led Isabelle and Clary as they rushed into the room, weapons drawn. “What on earth-“

“Magnus are you okay?!” Alec asked quickly, dropping his bow to his side ad he grabbed Magnus close with one arm, hugging him into his side.

“Alexander? I’m fine, what’s wrong?” he asked, looking up at him as he uncertainly hugged him back. Alec just kissed him suddenly, hard and fast. “Alec-“

“Thank the Angel,” Isabelle said loudly when she saw Simon peeking out. “Clary,” she said, and Clary ran past her to Simon, grabbing him in a hug.

“Oh Simon, I was so worried.”

Simon looked at Magnus, who was looking up at Alec with a furrowed brow, trying to get him to talk. “What’s wrong?” 

Alec looked up at him with the most ‘warrior firm’ expression Simon could remember seeing, and it worried him. “We heard from the DuMort earlier.” Simon’s heart sank and Alec continued. “They actually reached out to us because Raphael went out last night and didn’t come home.” Simon’s ears started ringing and he heard words like, ‘Camille’ and, ‘kidnap’, and worst of all, ‘she might come back’.

Magnus put a hand on Alec’s chest to make him stop and he went to Simon’s side. He guided him to sit on the couch and Simon blinked dazedly. “Simon, I would say ‘just breathe’, but you don’t really have to,” he said, grabbing Simon’s hands. “Simon, listen. If she took him-“

“She wants to kill him,” he said hoarsely. “He- he could be dead already.”

“We worried we would get here and you two would be dead already,” Isabelle said and Simon could see Magnus glaring at her. 

Simon looked up at Magnus. “What do we do?”

“To start with,” Magnus said, standing up. “I’m going to find her. I still have stuff around that I can track her with. Old photographs and such. If she took him, we might find him alive.”

Simon nodded weakly. “And if she… if he’s….” He couldn’t even finish his statement, his throat tightening when he tried.

Magnus reached out and petted Simon’s hair comfortingly. “I’ll stake her myself.” He walked over to Alec, nodding toward his office. “Come with me, Darling. I need some help.”

Clary came to sit with Simon, pulling him into a hug as he collapsed against the back of the couch with a heavy huff. He had a horrible feeling and he didn’t know if he really wanted to find out the truth about Raphael, because he couldn’t take it if he was gone.

~

“What do you need?” Alec asked Magnus, and Magnus held out a hand to him, tugging Alec around his side of the table.

“I need strength for this. Mine isn’t enough. Your angel blood can help me boost the signal, so to speak. It’s different to normal tracking because this doesn’t belong to her,” he said, opening the album on his table. Alec leaned over his shoulder and Magnus pulled the photograph of himself and Camille from the album. “It’s a photo of her. Not many people can ever do this, and it’s hard for me, too.”

Alec nodded. “Whatever you need.” He put his arms around Magnus for a moment, kissing the side of his head. “I was so worried about you,” he whispered and Magnus leaned into him just long enough to comfort him before reaching out to grab a metal, rune-covered plate off the far side of the table.

“Here we go,” he said, putting the photo on the plate. He snapped his fingers and he caught on fire, burning bright green. “I need your hands on my skin. I can’t hold your hand, I need those free, so just touch me.”

Alec pulled Magnus’s robe off his shoulders, letting it hang at his elbows so that he could put his hands on Magnus’s bare shoulders. “This okay?” he asked, and Magnus nodded, closing his eyes.

“This might hurt some, but something tells me you’re okay with that,” he said and he could feel Alec nod against his hair.

“We have to find her and stop her. I don’t want to put you in this position, Magnus, but you are our best bet. I’m down a parabatai, nobody else at the Institute will help until she takes a Mundane, and we have to do something now because the Vampires need her gone.” Alec sighed heavily, breath making Magnus’s hair flutter. “I know she’s somebody you have a complicated past with but I can’t do this without you-“

Magnus huffed out a laugh at how considerate Alec was even in such dire circumstances. “Darling, she took someone I care about and she wants to kill him. She might have already killed him. Whatever I felt for her over a century ago has been gone for a long time, and if she hurt Raphael weeks after I lost Ragnor, I will kill her with my own hands.” He turned to look over his shoulder at him. “Now get ready, okay?” Alec nodded, and Magnus closed his eyes, channeling his power towards finding her.

As he managed to slip into the search, visions flashing through his mind, he honed in on her, dipping his hands into the fire that didn’t burn him in reality, but felt like fire was coursing through his veins. He made a strangled sound of pain and felt Alec’s hands tighten on his shoulders as the pain hit him as well. His breath came in sharp pants as he fought through the pain and forced his way to find her. He had to find her and Raphael. He had to hope his friend would be okay and that he had a chance of saving him. He couldn’t lose Raphael, too. Not after everything. Not after all he had lost. He _had_ to.

All of a sudden, his eyes flew wide and he could see him. He could see through her eyes and he saw Raphael.

“I’ve got her,” he said, breaking the search. He turned around so fast Alec jumped back to avoid being hit by his elbow. “We have to hurry.”

He shrugged his robe back on and flew out to meet the rest of them, the mental image still lingering in his mind. Alec rushed after him. “Magnus, what did you see? Magnus!”

Simon leapt up and Magnus rushed over. “I found them, he’s alive, but we have to hurry. We have-“ He looked over at the clock that said it was already past nine. “Less than eight hours. I couldn’t get an exact location either, but I could see landmarks I recognize down below them, so if we can get there I can spot the building they’re on top of.”

Clary frowned at him. “On top of?”

Magnus nodded gravely. “She has Raphael chained on the roof of a building. She plans to leave him there until sunrise.”

~

It was obvious to Simon the moment they all burst out of the access door on the roof that Camille genuinely hadn’t expected anybody to find them. She looked downright shocked to see them there. “Well, well, well,” she covered quickly. “I wasn’t expecting a rescue party.”

Raphael turned around, chains rattling where they were fastened on the roof through a big, metal ring. He had room to move several feet any direction but there was no cover from the sun anywhere around them. Magnus stepped forward but Camille grabbed Raphael around the throat, stepping behind him quickly so that Alec, who was right behind Magnus, couldn’t loose an arrow lest he hit Raphael too. “Camille, stop,” Magnus commanded.

“Or what?” she asked, faking a pout. “I should’ve expected you would come after your fledgling, Magnus, but I sure wasn’t expecting the Nephilim to give a damn about one measly vampire.” She spotted Simon and her eyebrows rose as a smirk crossed her face. “And look if it isn’t my little caramel! Now what are you doing here with them?” She tutted, looking at Raphael. “You should’ve stopped me from killing that one, Raphael, because I have a craving for something sweet and my he was a tasty little treat. He would’ve been such a good subjugate so I could keep snacking rather than that huge indulgence.” She sighed over the top, shaking her head. “Either way, it’s lovely of you to show up, my little sweet treat, because I could use your help. I’m sure you came here out of some loyalty to your friends, but wouldn’t you rather come away with me? After I finish off this one you and I can rule the whole Clan together.”

Simon swallowed hard, shaking with fear and revulsion. “Please, Camille. Don’t hurt him.”

Camille scoffed. “Why would you care? Last I heard you were banished to lie with the dogs while they worked out what to do with you. Seems to me you would be better off without Raphael.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “Wanna finish him off with me?” She tightened the hold on his neck and Simon made a startled jerk towards her, even though he knew he couldn’t do anything to stop her. It was only Clary grabbing him that stopped him from blindly running over there. 

Raphael made a choked sound as she squeezed his throat. “Simon, please. Don’t watch.”

“Raphael,” he gasped out as he watched her hurting Raphael.

Raphael took a ragged breath, not for need to breathe but so that he could speak. “Run, Baby, please.”

“Wait, _Baby_?” Camille asked, looking at Raphael suddenly. She looked back at Simon with disgust. “You’re here for _him_ , not your Nephilim friends?”

Magnus held out his hands. “Camille, we don’t have time for this. I have an offer.” He stepped away from the group. “You don’t want to lead the Clan, and I know that. You want revenge for losing your position and I understand,” he said smoothly. “But how about this, how about you give the Nephilim Raphael and you and I can run away together.” Simon knew he was bluffing but Magnus sounded convincing even to him. “I promise, you can have me. Just don’t hurt Raphael.”

Camille gave an interested hum, stepping closer. “You promise, huh? Just like old times?” she asked and Magnus nodded. When he stepped close enough to her, she slid her arm through his. “Let’s take a moment to talk about the details. There’s enough time for that before the sun is a threat to anybody.”

“Whatever you think, Camille,” Magnus agreed, walking with her around the perimeter of this section of the roof. Simon watched nervously as they schemed. He trusted Magnus, but it sure seemed believable to him that Magnus was willing to just leave with her the way he was talking. 

“Remember London?” Camille asked, patting Magnus on the wrist. “Oh how you yelled because I ran off with that Mundane.”

Magnus chuckled. “Yes, well, having had my share of Mundane boys in the past few decades, it’s not unbelievable. They are the most fun. Now, about this whole ‘situation’. I can portal us anywhere you want to go,” he offered. He stopped just beside the edge of the roof, looking out over the city. “Anywhere in the city? The world?”

Camille leaned her head against his shoulder for a moment. “Oh Magnus. How lovely it would be. Unfortunately, I know your Nephilim boy is preparing to release an arrow any moment now,” she said suddenly, and Magnus turned to look at her in confusion, but before he could speak, Camille did the last thing Simon had ever expected and one of the last things he ever wanted to see.

She used her vampire speed and the hold on Magnus’s elbow to twist him around and _throw him off the building_. All of them screamed as Magnus’s shocked and terrified face was the last thing they saw before he fell. Rather than loose any arrow, Alec dropped his bow and ran to the side of the building with a cry. “MAGNUS!” 

He fell to his knees at the edge and Simon could feel the shock and horror settle into his bones. He wasn’t able to move. Everybody was silent. Even Alec just stared in horror at the empty space where Magnus had disappeared. 

“Now, where were we,” Camille interrupted, stalking over to Alec’s bow. She picked it up and snapped it, tossing it aside before stomping on the arrows. “Enough of that nonsense.” Isabelle and Clary were both frozen, still looking at Alec and the empty space in front of him in shock, so Camille walked that way, heading over to Alec. “Tough break, but don’t worry. You’re cute enough you’ll find a replacement soon.” 

“No,” he whispered so softly Simon was pretty sure it was only due to vampire hearing that he could hear. “No, Magnus, no.”

Camille laughed, still looking at the back of his head with a dark, horrible joy in her eyes. “Awww, don’t worry. He would’ve gotten tired of you eventually.”

In a flurry of movement, much to everybody’s surprise (though no one’s more than Camille’s) Raphael rushed up behind Camille with vampire speed and slung the chain holding him around her throat, snatching it tight. She choked in surprise, struggling, but Raphael just stood there, chest heaving as a bloody tear streaked his face. “Raphael,” she rasped and he just shook as he pressed his lips to her ear.

“This is for throwing my friend off a roof, you _bitch_ ,” he snarled and then, in a single move, he jerked the chain and in a second the chain snatched right through her neck. There was only a momentary look of shock on her face before her entire body crumbled to dust at Raphael’s feet.

Raphael sagged and Simon finally found it in him to move. He ran to Raphael, catching him as he swayed, lowering him down as he hugged him close, tears streaking his cheeks. “Raphael, oh God, _Raphael_ ,” he whimpered.

Raphael looked at the roof where Magnus had disappeared and he swallowed hard. “Magnus,” he breathed and Simon just nodded weakly, pressing his face into Raphael’s neck. 

“Please, somebody help me with these chains,” Simon asked, voice strained with pain as he, too, looked to the place Magnus disappeared from. Alec kneeling in silent shock while a crying Isabelle held him made it all the more horrible. “C-Clary?” he asked, and she started patting her pockets for her stele.

Before anybody could do anything, the chains released and a familiar voice rang out from the opposite side of their section of roof. “No need for a stele when you have magic.” Simon spun around in surprise and relief to see Magnus coming from behind the access door. 

“You,” Raphael growled as he stood and Magnus held out his hands.

“I created the portal, you think I couldn’t make one where I would have landed?” he asked with a bit of a flourish.

Raphael was at Simon’s side one moment and in the blink of an eye he had crossed the roof. Alec made an abortive motion to intercept before he could hurt Magnus, but before anybody could react, Raphael had his arms around Magnus, hugging him close. “You jerk, you bastard, I thought she had killed you, you shit!” Raphael cried, hugging the crap out of Magnus. 

“C’mon, Raphael, I wouldn’t give it up that easily,” Magnus comforted. 

Alec finally made his way over, and the moment he got close enough, Magnus pulled out of Raphael’s arms and reached for him. “Oh Darling, I’m so sorry, but it had to look genuine. I had to. I’m so sorry, Alexander, I-“

“I love you,” Alec gritted out, clutching Magnus to his chest. “I love you, I’m going to keep saying that until I stop wanting to strangle you, you jerk,” he laughed, clinging to his boyfriend. “Are you okay?” he asked, and Magnus nodded.

“Shhh, I’m okay, darling.”

Simon made his way over to Raphael, who watched Magnus and Alec with a heavy expression of relief. Simon curled his arms around Raphael from behind, relaxing when Raphael leaned back into his chest. “Why did you come here? She could’ve killed you,” Raphael murmured and Simon shook his head, kissing his earlobe.

“Because I love you, Raphael Santiago, and I wasn’t going to let her take you from me.” He kissed his jaw and gave a cheeky grin. “Granted, seems like you didn’t need anybody to save you, you just needed motivation to get rid of her yourself.”

Raphael nodded in his arms, relaxing into his chest. “Just don’t tell anybody my best friend is Magnus Bane and we’ll be alright.”

Simon giggled and kissed his jaw, nodding. “I promise.”

“Good,” Raphael said, before finally shouting over at Magnus and Alec – who had started making out – in a loud, clear voice. “Alright, alright, kiss later, but for now Simon and I need to get inside if you don’t remember. Vampires plus sunlight is bad, Magnus.”

Magnus just moaned against Alec’s mouth, flipping Raphael off. “Then fuckin’ go inside already, Jeez, I’m a little busy.”

Everybody apart from Alec just laughed at Magnus’s seeming indifference.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [darkness is the light](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10416870) by [swaggymailk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/swaggymailk/pseuds/swaggymailk)




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